2 stories of ah beng and ah lian

>Story 1
>Ah Lian ask shopkeeper: Eh Ah chek, u got sell stocking up to knee,
boh?
>Ah Chek: Lu siao ah! Stocking wear up to 'yeo' (waist) only, where got
up
to the 'nee'(breast) one.
>


>Story 2
>Ah Beng bought a Honda VTI recently and drove to Ah Lian's place to
show
it to her.
>So there Ah Beng was bragging the various functions of his new car to
his
girlfriend.
>"This is ah, so fast even the Mata Chia cannot catch ah!"
>Ha! Really ah!!! Steady lah!" said Ah Lian.
>"Some more hor, this is Automatic one, vely easy to drive!"
>Ah Lian said, "Let me try! I wan, I wan!"
>So Ah Lian took the driver's seat and shifted the gear and floored the
>accelerator. The next moment, the car sped backwards and crashed into
>the lamp-post. "Alamak! What u doing? U Siao Char Bo! U see la! Wah
>Piang eh!"
screamed
Ah Beng.
>"Solee, solee, pai sah la! No lah, I tot hor, "R" for racing mah!"*
>